Airing Your Dirty Divorce Laundry

Airing your dirty divorce laundry is not a good idea for anyone involved.

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Just because today’s celebrity-driven media blasted every little detail in the recent divorce filings of Miranda and Blake doesn’t mean you should do the same. After all, the media is just giving the readers what they want. Right?

With this latest Country divorce of Miranda and Blake becoming something of a spectator sport, a deep divide has emerged between those supporting Blake and those who believe Miranda was cheated on, lied to and tossed aside.

It’s hard to look away from the sensationalized headlines. The same is true for divorces of the not so rich and famous. Social media “oversharing” has become the expected. And though some stars may crave being in the public eye, even during a sordid divorce, such conduct can negatively impact legal proceedings as well as destroy any hope of remaining friends.

No matter how bruised you may be emotionally, you should not air your dirty laundry on social media or start a word-of-mouth crusade assaulting your spouse. If you need an ear and you probably will, talk to someone you trust to keep what you share confidential. But remember, what happened to cause the divorce is no one’s business but your own. It is for sure not the business of a friend from 5th grade who you recently re-connected with on Facebook.

Understand that whatever comfort you might gain from getting friends and family on your side can have serious consequences. One, it could very well open the door to a campaign against you. Two, do you really want your children to know all the messy details? Three, at one point you did love this person enough to say “I do” for the rest of your life.

It is easy to be spiteful when you are hurt. Take a step back and try to look at things objectively. Divorce is hard enough, reaching a resolution with integrity and civility can be even harder.

Many couples find a lot of benefits with the collaborative divorce process or using mediation, including less acrimony and more control of the process. It allows parties to move on their own terms and fosters a more positive environment for the children involved. It gives you a platform to build upon establishing positive family relationships after divorce.

Contact PJ Hartman before the dirty laundry gets aired in Albuquerque by calling 505-247-3335.